In all areas of psychology, Dream Analysis is probably where I feel most confident. Recently I was asked to analyze a dream regarding nudity in public. This is a common theme, but doesn't have to mean the same thing for everyone. It's funny really because often we're told that if we get nervous in public speaking to imagine others naked, but even the thought of the opposite scenario it makes us more nervous. I think the answer might be for us all to keep our clothes on.
The dream:
My grandparents would drop me off at this really cute old stone school. I would go in with a pink tutu, all happy to be wearing it. Then I would step through the door after my grandparents left and I would be naked! Embarrassed, I would be in constant search for it. At the end of the day I would go outside to get in the car, and I would be in my tutu again!My analysis:
What could this potentially mean if a child has a reoccurring dream like this? Especially a child who never even took ballet. Is this common?
It sounds like you feel safe and secure with your grandparents and that you're not so comfortable "in your own skin" when in public. It doesn't necessarily mean in school, but it could just be in public or away from your comfort zone, which is represented by your grandparents.
The fact that you're wearing a tutu could just represent a special childlike or princess feeling when you're within your safe zone. I would think it means you don't have that feeling otherwise.
I think this is very common. Usually a dream reoccurs to stress to you that it is important, but in this case I think you might just have this feeling often enough that maybe it's telling you that you need to work on feeling more comfortable with who you are all the time and not just when you're with your family.
This can be especially common if you're facing adulthood because leaving the safety of what you've always known, family and school, it can be very scary. Don't worry though, it all works out.
***So how'd I do? Just so you know I did get permission to use the dream in my post. So don't worry. Everything you guys write to me is not automatically shared with the world.
For a long time, I didn't know what was at the root of this fear and then I realized it had to have been this old lady who always sent her dog after me when I walked in front of her house. I can just remember trying to get to my friends house down the street and this woman letting her big black dog out and him charging toward me. Mind you, I was only like 8 or 9 at the time and she did this on purpose.
My parents confronted her on this often, but she never stopped. I don't know if she was just a scared old lady or if she had malicious intent, but this woman's actions severely affected my life. I still cannot just walk a neighborhood street for fear that a dog may be on the loose. I have broken down in front of friends and boyfriends, to my embarrassment, whenever a dog comes around. It's kept me from going to homes where I know there is a dog. So, it's been a hindrance, to say the least.
I know it's something I need to face and get over, but add it to the list.
Last night I dreamt about spiders and that wasn't so important as was the thought, within my dream, that I felt like I react to spiders like I do my mother. I woke, not knowing what that meant. All I did know was that I don't like spiders and I try to avoid them. So, before I got up and around, I stopped to reflect on why I would be having these same thoughts about my mom.
The thing about my mom is that she wasn't raised with a lot of affection and so she didn't give a lot. This didn't matter too much to me because I was very affectionate and would go to her when she didn't come to me. It wasn't until I got older that I resented that fact.
What I resent even more, however, is that my mom's side of the family is made up of a bunch of recluses who don't leave the house unless they have to. So, as a child, my mom never made an effort to do things with me. We never went to the park, except for the time when we were homeless and lived there. Which makes it understandable that, under the circumstances of our life at the time, fun wasn't her main priority.
Anyway, I don't like to think about these things because I know she did the best she could and I don't see the point to dwelling on it. However, I feel like I can't run from these things either and when they come up as they did in the dream, I think I need to face the truth of the situation that is my past.
So, after this soul searching, I naturally came to the conclusion that the dream wasn't telling me I needed to bash my mom. but it was warning me not to make these mistakes with my son. I say naturally because I let my mind wander and when I hit upon this conclusion, it felt right.
Being my mother's daughter, I am prone to wanting to be a home-body. This week, especially, was hard for me to get motivated and I didn't take the interest in my son that I should have. This dream was my wake up call. I believe we get several of these and, if we don't listen, then I think the world does something drastic to make us listen. I don't want that to happen and so it's time to get off my butt.
Recently a student contacted me and asked if I would take part in a project for school. I thought I'd share the questions I was asked and the answers I gave:
1. How did you get interested in psychology and dream study?
I started keeping a dream journal when I was 12. I had a dream so realistic and so disturbing that I wrote it down and hid it like a secret. I knew then that dreams were important. They could affect you. In fact, I still remember that dream vividly, 18 years later.
2. In practicing psychology, how crucial are a patient's dreams?
Dream Interpretation is a tool that can be used like any other. It's not crucial, but if you're good at interpretation, then I believe it's very helpful in discovering what's at the core of an issue.
3. How does a psychologist know how to accurately interpret dreams when there seems to be various interpretations of the same dreams?
I don't know that the psychologist actually interprets for a person though they can certainly have opinions. More so, I think a psychologist guides a person in discovering the meaning for themself. This, in some sense, is what psychology is all about. Who's to say any interpretations are "accurate", dream or not. It's all about guiding and when the answers right, it will click with the patient.
4. What do you believe is the true purpose of our dreams, if any at all?
The activities of the day often distract us from what is important in life. At night, we have to focus on what it is our mind has been telling us the whole time. So, I guess I think the purpose is to alert us to what needs attention or just reflection.
5. Do you believe people can derive symbols from their dreams? (ex: Can an apple just be an apple or does it always have to mean something else?)
I don't think that dreams are always literal, but they can be. I actually go more by the feeling of the dream. If the dream makes you feel sad, then I think it might have something to do with what makes you sad in the day.
6. What is the most interesting thing about dreams that you have come across during your career in psychology?
By far, the ability to control dreams through lucid dreaming has impacted my dream life greatly. I used to have nightmares all the time and once I learned to control my dreams, I took back my power. Of course, I have to already be in control during the day to control my dreams at night. Still, there's no feeling greater than being able to stand up to your nightmares.
7. Do you think people should really pay attention to their dreams?
I think many dismiss them, but many people dismiss psychology in general. I think that if you take your mental health seriously, then dream interpretation should be paid attention to.
8. Do you believe all dreams having some meaning?
I think there's a scale of importance and some dreams rank very low.
Last night I had a dream with a re-occurring situation. It's a little embarrassing, but it always involves going to a public restroom and either the door's broken or the stall doors are too short. Somethings always wrong.
Equally embarrassing, up until now, I had no idea what it meant. Then, this morning, I'm describing it to my husband and it just came out, "it's just not comfortable". That's it! For years, I've wondered and it's as simple as that.
This is why it is so important to say your dreams out loud. It was hearing myself say the phrase aloud that caused it's meaning to click in my mind.
It's about my OCD. So many of my rituals ("compulsions") take place in the bathroom. It's a place I dread to go and a place that I feel a great sense of discomfort in.
Now, if you look it up in a dream dictionary it will say something completely generic but it's all about what things/places mean to you. You can't go by generalities when it comes to true analysis.
Yes, you can die in a dream. I know because I have done it. Mind you it was a lucid dream. There was a car coming at me and I knew it would kill me, but I chose not to move. I wanted to see what would happen to die within the dream. I guess you could say I committed dream suicide.
It was actually a good dream though. After the car hit me, I saw a light, like everyone talks about, and I felt a peaceful warmth come over me. Now, that's probably because that's what I assume would happen when you die. Still, it was an interesting experience.
As far as the myth that you die in real life if you die in your dreams, I could imagine getting so worked up in a dream, or more like a night terror, that you might have a heart attack.
Night terrors are much worse than regular nightmares. Your body physically reacts to dreams much like it would if you were in fear or flight mode while awake. Your heart rate increases, you may sweat and/or scream out, etc.
I once had a night terror that rats were running over my body and I physically climbed over my husband and jumped out of bed. I was scared to death. The whole thing seemed so real. Luckily, I don't have those often. In fact, I think I only had that experience because I was on a medication that did not agree with me.
My nightmares, however, have been known to get very intense. If I had a weak heart, I hate to think the reaction I might have had to them.
Please feel free to share your experiences.
I haven't done a lot of research on how to evoke lucid dreams because they come naturally to me. However, there are tons of resources on the internet. I will try and list some resources when I find some good ones.
From what I've read so far, dream recall is very important in becoming lucid, or aware that you are dreaming. It's important because you need to learn more about your dreams and dream patterns in order to recognize within the dream that it is in fact a dream and not reality. Some sites suggest giving yourself reality check. For me, a dream can seem very real but then I'll notice one thing that doesn't make sense. For instance, I've had dreams where I wake from my bed, in my room, and everything is normal. Then, I'll notice that it's snowing outside and realize I'm dreaming because it's July.
So how do you learn to recall your dreams? Again, I don't really have this problem because I've always been so fascinated with dreams. It's like anything else that you study and learn. When you think of dreams during the day, studying them, and focusing on them, it becomes easier to recall and easier to use different dream techniques.
Now, maybe it's not that important to you, that you want to devote a bunch of time toward it. In that case, you should simply tell yourself before you go to bed, that you want to remember your dreams. I also use this time to focus on any questions I want answered.
It always helps to keep a paper and pen by the bed as well. While you don't need to journal everything in the middle of the night; when you wake after a dream, you can quickly scribble down key words. In the morning, these words will most likely trigger the dream or you'll at least get a laugh from the crazy words you're likely to write.
If it is the morning and no one is around, I like to say my dream out loud. This is extremely helpful to me if I don't feel like writing anything right away.
Hope these tips help. Please feel free to share yours. I will post more on this topic in the future.
As I mentioned before, I eventually took charge of my dreams, or nightmares I should say. I was in my early 20's and was in a huge transitional phase as most are at that age. I was in college, working, exercising daily, and feeling great about life in general. Then I found this book on dreams that discussed the art of "spinning". I don't remember the name of the book now, but it changed my life, or my life changed and my dreams followed. Either way, spinning really opened up my dream life to a whole other realm.
Basically, if you've had dreams where you are lucid, or aware that you're dreaming, your first response might be to wake up. I know mine always was. Once I'd realized I was dreaming, it was like the fun was over; but I was soooooooo wrong.
If you can stay calm enough to remain in a dream once you become lucid, you can take control of your dream world. One technique of doing this is "spinning", which is just that. You realize you're dreaming and you spin around in circles right there on the spot, within your dream of course. Once you stop, you will probably find that your surroundings have completely changed. Now, you are in control. Don't like where you're at, spin again. Don't like the storyline, spin again.
You can do whatever you'd like. I usually choose to fly because that is just the best feeling to me. It's funny, but when I fly I always run and jump up in the air like I need a running start.
I've also gotten to the point that I don't need to spin. I can change the surroundings just by waving my hand. I was once having a dream about my dad, after we found out he was sick, and I was telling him how much I loved him. We were in a huge city with a lot going on around us. I waved my hand at the sky above his head and suddenly there was nothing but a clear night's sky and just us. It was a beautiful dream that I hope I never forget.
I tend to have a great memory when it comes to dreams, but not much else oddly enough. I can still remember the first dream I ever wrote down in my dream journal just as if it had just happened. That's why dreams are so important to me, sometimes they're more real than my "real" life.
I hope that you will give spinning a try and please feel free to share the experience with me if you do.
Read more on my dream history here.
I started keeping a dream journal when I was 12. I had a dream so realistic and so disturbing that I wrote it down and hid it like a secret. I knew then that dreams were important. They could affect you. In fact, I still remember that dream vividly, 18 years later.
It was the beginning of a 10 year stretch of time in which 90% of my dreams were nightmares. I'm talking a lot of dreams too because I typically remember 3 a night. Believe me, they were easy to remember. I am not exaggerating either. I actually went and cataloged my dreams, titling them, numbering them, and categorizing them so that I could get a better idea of how serious the problem was.
The majority of my nightmares were split between my being chased by a killer, a monster, or dogs. I am terrified of dogs and I had been studying serial killers from the age of 13, so it made sense that they may play parts in my nightmares. Monsters were a rarity and probably slipped in there because I was young. The other main component in my dreams was that someone would always be around, see what was going on and sometimes I'd even go to them for help but they never would do anything. I was always ignored.
The obvious answer being that I'm afraid of these things so I have nightmares about them and that maybe I have issues with feeling ignored in my life. I knew that it meant something more than that and that once I figured it out and did something about it, the dreams would cease. Like I said, it took 10 years, but I finally did it.
Turned out that my nightmares were all about a feeling of being out of control. That's actually why I fear dogs in real life, because I can't control them. They're driven by something primal, something I can't understand or reason with. They can turn on you at anytime and that scares me.
I figured that part out pretty early on. That's why I stress that you don't only have to understand why you're having the dreams but that you also need to do something about it. It wasn't until I did something about these control issues that the nightmares stopped.
Once I became more in control of my life, I still had similar dreams but when someone would chase me, I would turn it around on them. I know I had one dream where I stopped running, turned on the guy and lit him on fire with a blow torch. It was brutal but so empowering. I can't even tell you how good it felt to not be afraid anymore.
